Ambassador to the Gods
by atothendy
Summary: When a splinter group of Asgardians attack and capture half of the Avengers, the rest of the group is left wondering what happened. With no way to travel to Asgard themselves, they're forced to ask a lost SHIELD envoy to find her way through the realm of the gods to free Loki and ask for help. Will Loki help find and save the Avengers, or does the god of lies have his own plans?
1. Prologue

**A/N:** I've been dying to write an avengers fic, but school… but avengers is just so much fun. This prologue's sorta meh though, it just introduces the OC mostly. Not that… it's _supposed_ boring. But just saying it's okay to skip - nothing too plot changing in here. WAIT – this is rated T for ridiculously course language… Just a warning. Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: I don't own marvel...

* * *

Oh for pities sake!" Loki cried, utterly exhausted. He turned around to face the midgardian who was stumbling down the sandy hill behind him, using whatever breath she had left to curse him with. "Can you _shut_ it?!" He cried at her. She talked _so much_. He wanted to throttle her, just wrap his hands around her neck and shake her until her skull rattled loose. "Are you so…" he panted, heaving himself up the hill to get closer to her, "utterly…" he growled, reaching for her shirt collar "useless…?" She easily batted his hands away and proceeded to roll down the sandy hill away from him. "ODIN-!" He cried after her retreating form, falling to his knees, "Odin take you!" he gasped, before collapsing facedown in the sand. "AGH!" he cried into the dirt, completely at a loss for words.

She lay at the foot of the hill and caught her breath. "It's…" she tried her best to shout up to Loki. "It's sorta… cooler… down here." She wheezed. There was a brief moment of silence before she felt some sand fly into her face and heard the scrape of his armor as he slid down the hill towards her. The dust settled, and she saw his hand flop into her view. They lay there, panting in the heat for a moment, before he had enough strength to speak again. "You're… you… you _lied_." He hissed.  
"Nyaaa..." She rasped back.  
"I'll… I'll kill you for this!"  
"Not if I… kill me first!" She coughed and turned over, crawling away from Loki and towards whatever destination they were going in the first place.  
"That's not… you're… WRONG WAY!" Loki snarled after her.  
"Fuuuuuuck." She collapsed, not three paces away from where she first started.  
Loki gritted his teeth and heaved himself upright, staggering forward. He made it a few steps beyond where the girl had fallen before he, too, collapsed in a heap. They lay in pained silence, cursing the two suns overhead that beat down upon them. It was too hot to complain anymore; the human settled into panting instead of cursing him, and the god contented himself with seething in silence instead of shouting at the human.

She rolled her head over to see if he was still breathing, and noticed patches of blue peeking through the skin on his neck. _Damn_, she though as her eyes began to close _…that's some freaky shit_.

~~~~~~~~Five Years Earlier~~~~~~~~~

The calming sound of the ocean gently filled small, untidy room. It rumbled powerfully, and then whispered softly, allowing the calls of seagulls to be heard through the noise of the water before it rushed back in. A few rays of sunlight managed to filter in through the blinds, dancing across the young woman's cheekbones and playing over her eyes. She cracked one eye open, appreciating the warm glow, and the soft calls of gulls…

"_SHIIIIIIIIIT!"_ Maxine burst out of bed, sheets suddenly conspiring to murder her and send her tumbling to the floor. "No no no, not now, not now!" She twisted and tried to pull them from her ankles, nearly bursting into tears at its futility and the maddening squabble of those stupid seagulls.  
"Shut your mouths!" She screamed at her alarm clock, pulling herself up right and slamming on every possible button in reach. "I'll kill you all!" She held the clock up to her face, not because of poor eyesight, but because the screen was now cracked and she could barely make out the numbers.  
"Eight?" She dropped the clock and instead stumbled over her bed sheets and flopped onto the bed, groping under her pillow for her phone. _Please be eight please be eight please be eight_ she chanted, hoping it would help.

"ELEVEN?!" She howled up at her ceiling fan. _Late, Unacceptable_. She froze there on her bed, staring at the ceiling. _Maybe I should just stay home, tell them all I was sick, dying… dead. No… I'll be dead if I don't go._ She looked over to her cupboard. At least she had ironed her clothes and set them out the night before. _But my hair… my face… _She continued to stare at the wooden doors, delaying making up her mind on whether or not she was going to get ready or stay home. _Go… but I'll be late… so don't go… I can't… fine I'll go… alright… but do I take long and get all of me ready and arrive even later, or rush and get there sooner but still later?_ She looked over to her little hamster in its cage, running on his wheel. "You're right," She agreed with his silent statement. "I should just go. Thanks Snuff." She opened the cage and put in a few sunflower seeds for good measure, rewarding Mr. Snuffles for his great insight. "Keep up the good work soldier."

She shut the cage door and, making sure to sneak around her bed sheets so they didn't kill her again, rushed to the bathroom to get ready. She washed her arms with hand soap and called it a shower, swished mouth rinse and called it brushing her teeth, and raked a brush through her wild hair and tied it up into a nondescript ponytail. She stabbed her cheek and nose with mascara before remembering where her lashes were, and completely overlooked the blush, eye shadow, and lipstick she had so thoughtfully put out for herself the night before. _Damn me I was supposed to get this right!_

She struggled into her uniform and laced up her boots and almost forgot to put on her silly little beret that Shield insisted she wore. She couldn't even look herself in the eyes when she stood up to the mirror; _I'm so sorry past Maxine_, she apologized to her last-night self, _I won't do this again_. She glanced down at her boots reflection in the mirror, and they shuffling awkwardly. _What am I supposed to be doing again? _One of the boots scratched behind the other one and she nearly lost her balance. Catching herself on her dresser, Maxine looked over to the porcelain ballerina figurine that slowly turned inside its music box_. I remember you_, she smiled at the memory of one of her engineering friends rigging the music box so that the dancer always danced, but the music never played. _I really am supposed to be doing something right now_. She stared at the figure more closely. _…Engineering?_  
"SHIT THE CEREMONY!" She shoved off from the dresser and stumbled over to her jacket. "Be good Snuffles!" She shouted at her hamster as she grabbed her car keys from the side table and flew down the stairs of her apartment.

There was a working elevator, which Maxine forgot about in her mad rush as she skidded around corners and tore down stairs into the underground parking. She jumped into the driver's seat and turned on the car, casting a glance at the clock before squealing at the back of her throat all the way out of the garage and into New York's traffic. She had missed the bus that Shield had sent specifically for the people living in the New York area to transport them down to Texas; she'd have to drive there herself. _Shit my luggage! …wait… didn't I pack that last night as well?_ She felt the twinge in her heart again like she'd let herself down after being so careful. It was a weird feeling.

She punched in Shield's party location on her GPS to track the fastest route from… wherever she was now. All her life she had lived in New York and _still_ she got the street names wrong. "There you are you sneaky bastard!" She hissed at the highlighted route. The induction ceremony was going to be held in one of Shields offshoot stations – no way they'd give away their super-secret base location and hold a ceremony there. Still, she wondered why they chose Texas; there were a lot of other places to go. _Damn it, hurry up granny!_ If she constantly drove over the limit she might even make it there in time. But that would only happen if gran-gran in front of her decided to drive with the gas instead of the brake. "GO GRANDMA GO!" As if on cue, the elderly woman in front of her made a painfully slow left turn and Maxine shot out from behind her, just in time to make it through an orange light a few blocks down. _Please don't let the cops see me,_ she prayed silently.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"These streamers are ugly as _hell_." Fury knocked a few dangling pieces out of his face and made his way through the throngs of people towards the podium.  
"I heard they were delivered thirty crates of sunset orange instead of steely blue." Coulson explained, also weaving his way a few paces behind the director.  
Fury snorted and shook his head, but said nothing in return. He marched on, but had to stand and wait for a large group of people in front of him to slowly make their way to the other side of the room. He sighed impatiently and clasped his hands behind his back in irritation. _Let's go people_.  
"Wow, there are actually a lot of them." Coulson noted.  
"Hm." Fury agreed.  
"At least seven."  
Fury was a bit taken aback and looked over to the agent, disconcerted that something like that would come out of Coulson's mouth. "Yeah…" he agreed hesitantly, "…seven."  
Coulson noticed the empty walkway and nodded towards it, "after you," he motioned forward.  
Fury let the comment go and continued on to the stage, but Coulson turned to one of the secretaries instead. "Got the time?"  
"It's almost one," she replied, "Director Fury can start his speech soon, just give the people some time to find their seats."

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"I'm not late!"  
One of the guards jumped at the sudden outburst and just managed to catch a glimpse of someone speeding by. "Hey wait!" He called after it, "you need to check… in…" Gone. The figure had melded into the crowds before he could even see who it was. "Should I…?" He turned to another guard, who was leaning back in his chair, "call this in?"  
The guard just shrugged and didn't take his eyes off his magazine he was reading. "If it turns out to be a terrorist, they went through your gate, not mine."  
Guard one grumbled, and picked up his radio.

Maxine eyed the other initiates around her, taking in all the straightened spines, firmly ironed lapels, and nervous glances. _When did all these idiots grow up? _She looked down at her own uniform which had been slightly crumpled on her way from New York and smelled faintly of French fries, but was otherwise intact. She beamed internally at her surprisingly good fortune; she had driven nonstop for a full day and just made it in time before the gates closed. Now all she had to do was find her squad and wait to be welcomed with open arms into Shields secretive ranks. She almost squealed with nervousness, but managed to swallow it.

"MIMI!" Maxine turned to the overly excited screech that had burst forth from a girl a few feet from her. "Uh, I mean, agent Gardner-"  
Maxine bared her teeth in a forced smile. "Hello Jules." She hadn't planned on socializing just yet. Especially not with _Miss-Friggin-Julia_.  
"It's agent McComb now. Sounds so formal! This is so exciting Mimi! Oh- agent Gardner I mean. This is going to take some getting used to – I'm so excited! This place is so awesome, right?! I-"

Maxine tuned her almost-least-favorite squad mate out and sipped at her cup of – _What is this, grape juice? Who serves grape juice at an induction ceremony?_ She scanned the crowds for any one of her other squad mates, but couldn't find the telltale signs of ridiculously raucous laughter and crowds gathered around a single person. Most of her squad's members were very sociable, which turned out fine in the end, since she was forced to be friendly as well. That and the fact that by some miracle she had tested into squad five, who were almost always given jobs that required social skills. Unlike squad three's, who were usually snipers and other long-range people - social skills were not something they had to pass on. Or squad eleven's who dealt with paperwork. There was literally a Shield squad for secretaries. _Who knew that paperwork could be something so serious? I wonder if Shield teaches them how to kill people with post-its and rubber bands…_

She smiled into her cup at the thought, and watched as a large family group ambled past. The mother was busy pestering her Shield-son to wash his underwear and to remember his inhaler. _Wheezer_. She remembered the boy; he was in her squad as well, but mostly stayed with the boy's side. Each boot camp squad had been separated by gender, but every squad in a facility came together during mealtimes, and the two genders in a squad came together to take tests and run courses – but other than that the boys tended to stick with boys and the girls likewise. But today was different. Every single squad that was scattered across each facility in every state had come together for the induction. The threes from Arizona and North Dakota got to meet the threes from Deleware and Virginia; the twelves from Oregon got to meet the twelves that lived in Michigan and so on. Maxine made eye contact with Wheezer and he offered her a wary smile - Maxine grinned whole heartedly and gave him a thumbs up.

"…and they never heard from him again!" Julia finished up her story that Maxine had been ignoring. "Mimi… Mimi, did you hear me? He died there Mimi! Dead! DEAD!"  
"Jules!" Maxine turned to her squad mate. "I heard, but keep your voice down."  
"Why? You scared someone will hear? No one's listening."  
"I'm looking for… Joe," Maxine tried to come up with an excuse. "I can't see when you shout so loud."  
"Well, that makes no sense - I'll help you look." Julia stood on her tiptoes and shaded her eyes, squinting against the suns glare. "He might be inside…" She motioned towards the plane hangar that had been turned into a temporary auditorium for the day's activities. Julia watched Maxine's impassive face, "I'm sure he passed…" she murmured reassuringly.  
"Uh-huh." Maxine didn't mind whether or not Joe passed, she didn't even know there was someone named Joe on her team. _Must be some nickname I didn't pick up on_.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

Coulson tapped at the microphone, making everyone within a forty foot radius cover their ears at the sudden high pitched whine. "Can I have your attention please?" he muttered into it unnecessarily – literally everyone was glaring at the stage with a mixture of confusion and anger. "If you could all take your respective seats - we're going to begin here soon."  
There was a moment of slightly audible protests before the hangar was once again filled with the energetic sounds of a hundred conversations going on at once. Maxine had been caught up in the microphones squeal, but managed to shield her ears before she was too terribly deafened.

"I heard that there's some scientist working with gamma rays and stuff. I didn't even know gamma rays were a thing. Well, I knew they were a thing, but I mean like, wouldn't that stuff be dangerous? Wouldn't it-"  
"Julia… agent Grey… Jules," Maxine pleaded. "Please help me… search… for Joe. You check out the punch stand and I'll go see if he's already seated."  
"Sure thing Mimi! I'll always lend a friend a hand."  
"Thank you Miss Julia," Maxine spoke through gritted teeth and a sketchy grin. "Your kindness knows no bounds." If Squad five taught her anything, it was how to lie beautifully. Not always well, but with, 'A hella lotta finesse - like figure skatin' while decapitatin' yer partner n' such.' as her captain had put it.

Julia beamed and made her way to the punch bowl without questioning her squad mate. _Punch bowl my ass, _Maxine fumed silently._ That stuff tasted like grape juice. Speaking of grape juice, I gotta get out of here before she comes back. Not that that's… even related. _Maxine disposed of her plastic cup and made her way over to the folding chairs that had been set up for the occasion. _At least they have the padded cushion thingies sewn into them. _She thought the herself, i_t'd be so lame if Shield just set up a bunch of metal chairs and called it good._  
"Hey! Maxi-pad!"  
_Son-of-a-sweet-bitch_ _I thought I got everyone to stop calling me that_.  
"Heard you were looking for me sweetheart. What's shakin'?"  
Maxine turned to whoever had addressed her. He looked like a model for a clothing department; _all he needs is a weird pose and a puppy_. "The only thing that's shaking here," She snarled "will be your dead body when I lodge a spork into your spine."  
"Whoa there tiger, I-"  
"DON'T CALL ME MAXI PAD!"  
"Take it easy buttercup-!"  
"Who are you calling buttercup, _holli-fucking-ster_?"  
"Shit lady I thought you were looking for me!" The strange blonde dude held up his hands in defense and feigned an apologetic expression.

Maxine recognized that stupid face. It was Roberts, Roberts… whosiewhatsit. Last name was Roberts? He had originally been assigned to squad five but was transferred to whichever one of the squads dealt with people who were mostly annoying but fought too well to be let go. The only problem was that he had been in her squad long enough to learn some of the skills associated with being a level five; like sticking thought knives in insecure places... like nicknames. "I don't know what part of your deluded brain conjured up that idea," Maxine seethed. "But I can't think of a single plausible reason for me to be looking for someone like you."  
Roberts inhaled like he'd been stung and did the fake smile again, and Maxine imagined punching him in his ridiculously white teeth. "Your friend Jules sent me." He explained. "She's a great girl, nice… uh…" he pantomimed an hourglass and raised his eyebrows as if expecting her to agree with him.

"Yeah uh, no… OH!" Maxine finally connected him with Julia, "You're Joe!"  
"Joe" coughed and nodded, "Yeah, but I prefer Roberts if you don't mind…"  
"Oh, but it's okay to call me something like maxi-pad?" Maxine remembered not to cross her arms in front of her, and instead opted for putting them on her hips. "Listen, you, I needed to go look for my parents… my brother is Joe, and I think Julia just got confused."  
Joe raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you squad five? I thought you guys were good liars."  
"DID I STUTTER?"  
"No…" Joe grinned, "But your ears are twenty shades more red than they were a few seconds ago."  
"Fuck off." Maxine waved him away and went to find her seat, mostly just so she could have an excuse to turn away from him. _Damn, I forgot to remember to calm down before lying. This is so stressful! I'll never pass my final like this!_

"If you could all find your seats, that would be great." Coulson droned over the speakers again.  
_Shut up I've been looking for my seat for hours! _Maxine tripped over some lady's badly placed bag and had nearly recited every curse word in her dictionary by the time she managed to sit down. _Couldn't they make the rows bigger?_

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"They're taking their sweet time with this one." Fury noted.  
"Almost all the seats are filled…" Coulson counted only about twenty open ones.  
"Well where the hell are those people?"  
Agent Coulson glanced over at Fury. He seemed slightly on edge… but not quite enough to pull out a gun and start shooting things. "Something bothering you, director?"  
Fury's gaze flicked over the rows of people in front of him. "Some damned kid snuck by the guards; didn't get a good look at 'em."  
A small smile tugged at the edges of Coulson's lips. "Squad eight…?"  
"Might be," Fury agreed. "Or maybe our damn mall cop squad is getting lax and letting every goddamn _grandmother and their cat in_!"

The hangar fell silent again.  
Coulson cleared his throat, "Uh, Fury, I think you left the microphone on."

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

_Letting everyone in…?_ Maxine glanced down and noticed her serious lack of nametag. _Oh_.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"Let's begin without them." Coulson prompted, "It might be nothing, maybe someone was just running late."  
"Humph." Fury didn't believe that for a second. The only logical explanation was that there was someone here that wanted to kill everyone. He stepped up to the microphone that had been situated in the middle of the stage and glancing around the large crowd, clasped his hands behind his back once more and stood completely immobile for a full minute.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"Did he…" One of Maxine's squad mates leaned over to her and whispered. "…forget his speech?"  
"I don't know." Maxine replied honestly, taking in the sight of the large man with black coat and eye patch before her. _He probably doesn't even try to look menacing and it just happens_. "But he's the director so… technically he's all the squads rolled into one."  
"He should be able to make something up on the spot then," Her teammate responded. "It's a requirement that our squad has."  
_Shit, really? Did I miss that in the handbook?_ "Uh-huh," Maxine agreed a little too enthusiastically, "Yeah, right on the spot… haha…"

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

Fury held the pregnant pause for a solid three minutes, all the while gazing around the room and taking in the people before him. There were only two open seats left now, and he counted thirteen initiates without name tags.  
"This…" he suddenly barked, which made everyone in the hangar jump. "…is unacceptable!"  
There was a smattering of awkward laughter from the parents, but all the squad initiates stayed silent.

He glared at the rooms inhabitants until they fell into an awkward silence again. "You, boys and girls," he motioned to the first several rows that held the initiates, "will one day be part of the most dangerous – and most vital – organization that this country has ever had." Fury paced to the other side of the stage and chose one unlucky initiate to glare at before slowly stalking to the other end of the stage to glower at another. "_And you can't even keep track of a goddamn name tag_." He hissed at the poor guy, who actually did have his name tag on.

The hangar stayed silent; even breaths were muffled - as if they feared breathing too loudly would call attention to them, and Fury would swoop down and slaughter them. "Damn disappointments." He hissed. Fury was nowhere near the microphone, but everyone had heard him - and it showed in the initiate's eyes.

Maxine scowled down at her breast pocket where they had to pin their badges, as if it were her pockets fault that she didn't get her nametag. _I was so close… _She wanted to punch herself in the face over and over again. She had done so well in boot camp and in her tests; she was one of the few recruits who had managed to get into the training facility right after high school instead of the usual halfway through college or after college thing most people did. She was twenty one now, and if shield didn't allow her in, she wouldn't have a degree to fall back on like the others did. _I've based my entire career on this place_, she seethed internally. _If I don't get in because I forgot my nametag I will literally go and jump off the nearest cliff. _

Maxine glanced up to the stage to see why Fury wasn't speaking anymore, and realized he was staring right at her. _…oh shit. _She smiled and bit her tongue to keep from jumping up and apologizing for everything she'd ever done – she even felt a tiny lump form at the back of her throat. _I can't tell if I'm about to cry or if this is literally what it feels like when words get stuck in your throat. _  
"Breathe…" Maxine heard one of her friends whisper without moving their mouth. "Breeeeaaaathe."  
She couldn't, not with _director Fury_ staring at her like that_. If I smile any wider,_ she cried to herself, _my face will split in half._

Maxine felt her peripheral narrow in terror when he opened his mouth, and wished she could melt into the seat. _Go away…_  
"I'll be talking to your captain." Fury whispered.  
_No._

* * *

**Thanks for reading! :)**


	2. Mimicry

Disclaimer: I'll let you know when I finally buy the rights from Marvel. Or. Disney. Whoever owns whatever.

* * *

"Thor, why don't you ever answer your phone?"  
"My… what?" The god of thunder looked up from the cards that he clutched at haphazardly between his hands.  
"Your phone. I gave you a phone, you never use it." Tony Stark flicked through the cards he held and grimaced. "Hey…" he looked over to Steve. "Got any fours?"  
Steve looked down at the cards in his lap and shook his head no.  
"Uh, no." Tony tapped on the table's surface in front of Rogers. "Keep your cards where I can see 'em… wouldn't want anything 'accidentally' slipping into your sleeves…"  
"I'm wearing a T-shirt." Captain America looked over at Stark in disbelief, but complied and placed his hands above the table.  
Thor tried to shuffle through his hand without dropping the small cardboard rectangles while the two men argued over who was the real  
cheater. "I'm afraid that I am out of fours as well my friend," he interrupted, "but you may go and fish for some."  
"Thor, he asked me." Steve told the slightly confused god, who still hadn't figured out how to play go fish even after four rounds. "You ask one person for a card, you don't have to tell us what you have."  
Tony grumbled and added another card to his already growing pack. "Cheaters." He muttered.

Steve ignored the comment. "Nines, Mr. Stark?" He asked.  
Thor remembered not to answer, and they both looked over expectantly at Tony.  
Stark glanced down to his cards and then back up at his opponents. "I have nothing." He said, leaning onto the table. There was a slight fluttering sound as a card fell out his other jacket sleeve and onto the floor.  
Steve leaned back in his seat and eyed the card on the ground. "That looks suspiciously like a nine, Tony."  
Stark said nothing, and didn't move when Steve picked the card up.  
"What was that you said," Captain America asked, "about cards up our sleeves?"  
Tony sniffed. "You must've put it in there when you had your hands under the table."  
"What."  
"You know, planting evidence so no one would suspect you. Thor-" Tony changed the subject, "Where is your phone?"

"I-"  
Steve threw his hand of cards on the table and got up to leave.  
"Aw come on Spangles," Tony complained. "I didn't know it was there, don't be such a spoil sport. Sit down. Please… please? I'll cry."  
Steve pushed his chair in and grabbed the pile of money from the table. "I've won."  
"What?" Stark looked down at the cards that had been discarded. "No way."  
"I have seven sets," Steve stuffed the bet into his pants pocket, "that's more than half the deck; you guys will never catch up."  
Tony stared incredulously at Steve's side of the table.  
"Well done!" Thor laughed and got up to clap Rogers on the back. "You've beaten us thoroughly!"  
Steve just grinned sheepishly and put his jacket on to leave.  
Thor looked over to an exasperated Tony and pushed his cards forward. "I believe it's customary to allow the loser to clean up the cards, is it not?"  
"You lost too!" Stark exclaimed,  
"Yes but I don't know how to play."  
Thor left alongside Steve, and the two walked out discussing various go fish strategies.

"Yeah, well…" Tony sat at the table, still unimpressed. "It bothers me that a full grown man even KNOWS how to play GO FISH!" He shouted after them, and pouted when he heard the door shut. "Humph." He got up and stretched, scowling at the place where Captain America had been sitting. _Hang on…_ Stark moved over to Steve's chair and squinted at the last row of cards that Rogers had thrown down. _That's not a nine…_ "HEY!" He got up so fast that he knocked the chair over. "HEY! HEY! CHEATER!" He grabbed the cards and jogged out the room after the two. "STEVE'S A CHEATER!" He shouted down the hall.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

Banner snapped the lid to the small device shut and screwed it closed. "There." He smiled across the metal table to the skittish looking girl tugging at the end of wild hair. "It should work now. Why don't you put it back on and give it a try?"  
"Is this really necessary?" She looked over to Fury sheepishly and asked, attaching it to her arm uneasily. "Last time it shocked me pretty bad. My hair still smells like burn when I wash it."  
Fury watched the process apathetically. "This is important, Gardner. Besides, most of the kinks are worked out…" Fury trailed off and looked over to Banner, who didn't exactly nod in agreement like he'd hoped.  
She clasped the watch-looking object to her wrist and fumbled with the little dials on the side. "What was the number thing again?" She asked, "or do you wanna do it?"  
"No, you go ahead." Banner responded, "The _frequency_, agent Gardner, is 122.2, 10.7..."  
She nodded for him to continue.  
"…07.7, 05.9, 01.7."  
She punched in the last number and waited for the little dots on the screen to stop spinning.

"Nyaaa…" She held her arm away from herself and cringed, expecting to be blasted in the face or shocked again. Fury craned is neck to get a better look and Banner leaned in closer as well, both men expecting something truly remarkable.  
"Any second now…" Banner whispered.  
"GUYS!" Stark burst in, brandishing four playing cards like a weapon. "Steve-!"  
Maxine shrieked and stumbled away from the door that nearly slammed into her face.  
"TONY!"  
"Holy shit I'm-"  
"Wait, Spangles isn't here…"  
"It worked!" Maxine peeked around the offending door and grinned at the director and the two Avengers.  
"Yeah it worked," Stark frowned. "Because you cheated that's why it worked."

He slammed the four cards down on the metal table and leaned against it. "You thought I wouldn't see that six there, didn't you? That's three nines and a six," he and sauntered over to where Maxine stood and handed her the cards. "Did you think I wouldn't notice?" he asked.  
"S-sorry?"  
"Sorry's not going to cut it Rogers!" Tony cried. "Put the pot back!"  
"Pot?" Fury asked.  
"Not… pot." Tony corrected. "We had a small bet going… you know," he shifted and grabbed the cards back from Maxine, "friendly wager."  
"Uh-huh."  
"Tony…" Banner squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Tony that's not Steve, that's agent Gardner. She's currently modelling the invention you were supposed to have done by this morning…"

"Oh… well…" Tony looked over to where a very Steve-looking Maxine stood poking her biceps. "It looks done," He shrugged.  
"That's because while you were off drinking yourself into a coma last night I finished it."  
"That's not cool." Tony walked up to Steve-Maxine and pried the device in question off, returning her to her normal self.  
"Aw, my muscles!"  
"I told you not to work on this." Tony chided, fiddling with the dials on the side.  
"You were going to miss your deadline." Banner said.  
"Brilliance doesn't have a deadline."  
"Well, you did." Bruce retorted. "A self-set deadline too - you've been working on this for months."  
"I couldn't get the thing with the…" Tony waved his hand about airily. "You know they wouldn't attach the things… it wouldn't…"  
Stark looked between the three, each giving him the same blank stare.  
_Does he expect us to believe this? _  
_ Why the hell do I let Shield fund this asshole?_  
_ I really want that watch back._  
He rolled his eyes. "Well, it's done." He kicked a metal chair loudly out the way, hoping the sudden movement would make Banner jump at the very least. "Now all I have to do it attach it to the suit."

Maxine noticed that Banner didn't so much as flinch. "So what… is it?" She asked Stark timidly, still unused to being around the Avengers. "It obviously makes you look like someone else but…"  
"I'm so glad you asked." Tony sat on the edge of the chair he'd kicked not moments ago and held the small device up to the light. "I'll put it simply; it creates a sort of hologram around whoever's using it. I, uh… saw something similar being worn by someone else once." Tony stopped the story for a second to rub a small smudge off the screen. "Only, clearly, theirs isn't as good as mine." Banner snorted, and Tony threw him a wounded look. "What I was _trying_ to do," he continued, still staring at Bruce, "was create a textured hologram. The one I saw modeled before could only get the picture, so if you touched them… you'd know something was up. I want to put it on my suit so I can walk around in it _every day_ and no one will know. Very useful for quiet entrances."  
"'Kay…" Maxine gave Tony her best 'I get it' look and hoped he approved.  
"What I was trying to do before _that _was get the numbers right but…"  
"The numbers…?" Maxine asked.  
"Frequency." Stark clarified.  
_Heh. He says numbers too._  
"The frequency dictates what type of surface is put onto the various pieces of whatever present in the thingy."  
"Wait what?"

Tony flicked a dial and turned into a Fury look-alike. "If I screw with the first number in Fury's frequency his hair… or lack thereof… gets weird." He adjusted a few buttons, and hair suddenly sprouted from Fury's head and poofed into a very frizzy afro. "Now all I to do is find a way to change the colors." The large man seated on the chair lifted his eye patch to better see the screen. "I think we can all agree that this afro needs some pink."  
"You don't sound like the Director." Maxine noticed.  
"Yeah, well, one thing at a time."  
The room grew quiet as Tony lapsed into his "I actually have shit to do" state and became enraptured with the little device in his hands.  
"Well, I'll leave you to ladies to it then." Fury said, nodding to the two scientists. "Gardner?" He asked, turning to Maxine.  
"Director."  
"We have work to do."  
"We?"  
"You."  
"Aw."

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

Maxine trotted to keep up with the directors long gait, taking in all the chrome walls and huge windows. "This place is huge. Is it Starks tower or Shields?"  
"That depends on who you're asking." Fury answered. "Stark turned this over to the Avengers after Loki attacked. He'd still say it's his though."  
"Is it?"  
"'S'pose so. Why are you so interested?"  
"Just wondering why I'm here mostly." Maxine looked over to the director inquisitively. "Are you going to make me join and hit things?"  
"No, no, you're staying with Shield." Fury answered, swiping a card to get into an elevator. "We need you there, but I'm gonna need you to… forget a few things before you get back to the main site."  
"YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME?!" Maxine cried, gripping the railing in the elevator like it was about to save her life.

"No, no, dammit girl." Fury backtracked. He sighed and tried to explain what he wanted. "Shield assigned you to report between us and them, correct? You're also one of Shields ambassadors…?"  
"I got promoted, I'm the backup for the guy who works with Canada, next promotion and I actually get to go there!" She announced proudly.  
Fury nodded, and tried to prod the conversation in the right direction. "…and you got the job because…" he offered.  
"Because I scored well on the tests and I accidentally killed the guy who came in first?"  
"And…?" Fury asked.  
Maxine stared at him blankly, then blushed and looked down at her feet. "Er, because director Fury didn't kick me out for not having a nametag and he rigged the tests… only he told me not to tell anyone."

Fury led the way out the elevator and down into the Towers main floor. "I didn't rig those damn tests." He retorted.  
"Seemed like you did."  
"Well maybe you just studied really well. Listen up," He turned to Maxine and she just managed to stop in time before running into him. "I need you to forget that little watch thing you saw Stark working on in your next report."  
"Okay. Would Shield even-?"  
"I don't want to find out." Fury interrupted. "It's nothing Shield needs to know about, and I'd like to avoid unnecessary… attention."  
"Sure thing, I guess." Maxine responded, feeling awkward.  
"Atta girl." Fury patted her shoulder and led her to the front doors. "And Maxine?"  
She turned to him from her bag she was rummaging through for her keys. "Yeah?"  
"I'll see who I can talk to about that promotion."

Maxine grinned like a kid in a candy store. She was being bribed and she knew it. _But Fury's a good guy; I'll bet he has good guy reasons for keeping Shield in the dark. Besides, we help each other out. Greater good, right? …Right?_ She watched Fury walk back into the building, and felt the sickening twist of anxiety creep into her stomach. _Damn you, morals_.

~~~~~~~~Several Months Later~~~~~~~~~

Fury sat across the table from the Hulk, watching the behemoth try to build a puzzle with his huge hands. The large green beast sat there, trying to pick a single puzzle piece off the table for over a minute before Fury finally intervened and handed it to him. The room around them was cozily quiet, save for a snap from the fireplace and a soft laugh from Natasha every so often as she and Clint whispered. Steve was busying himself decorating the Christmas tree in the corner of the room, and Maxine was stringing popcorn whenever she wasn't eating it. Perfect silence.

"Do you have to do that?!" Banner snapped suddenly, looking up from his newspaper.  
"What? Is it making you nervous?" Hulk asked, sounding a lot like Tony Stark.  
Banner said nothing, but shook his paper out and resumed his reading.  
"I can't get it off." Hulk shrugged indifferently. "It's stuck in the joint of my armor and Hulk's fists of ham and fingers of butter are too damn big to take off something so delicate."  
"Well why didn't you just say so?" Banner asked, getting up to help Tony take off his invention.  
"I thought you knew."

Bruce rolled his eyes at Tony's childishness, and hesitated picking up Hulks hand.  
"Are you nervous yet?"  
"Shut up Tony. Where's the watch?"  
"_Pocket projector_. It's called a pocket projector."  
"Really. Last time it was a hologram hotpocket."  
"Too wordy." Hulk patted his wrist. "Also it made zero sense. My pocket projector is right here." He pointed to the spot where Banner should start prodding. "If you can't feel it it's because the device is doing what it's supposed to do."  
Banner ignored the remark and squeezed and pulled at Hulks wrist.  
"HULK SMASH!" Hulk roared, making everyone in the room jump.  
"Fuck's sakes Tony!" Bruce cried, gripping the device in his hand. "Stop moving!"  
"Sorry."  
Banner managed to free the little metal watch and gave it back to Iron Man.

"Thanks. You like the voice? I made it imitate Hulks voice, but it's really hard to get a complete match. Pepper still sounds like Pepper but when I ran her wavelength through the machine it actually came up as Coulson's. I don't even remember putting his vocal frequencies on here."  
"I did that." Banner took the device from Tony and turned it over in his hands. "I added the rest of the teams DNA and frequencies onto the database and loaded their models on as well…"  
"Science." Barton interrupted, having snuck up on the two men earlier. "Science science, science-science."  
"Science?" Tony asked, turning to him and forgetting the conversation at hand.  
Clint nodded and patted Starks shoulder. "Science" he agreed somberly.  
"You hear that Banner?" Tony asked. "_Science_."  
"Jay-zus." Fury got up and left the table, unable to take in so much stupid at once.

Steve eyed the director warily from the corner of the room and turned back to his tree, ignoring the comment. "Are you done with that popcorn yet soldier?"  
"Negative." Maxine responded with her mouth full. "Gimmie a minute."  
"Hurry up."  
"Yessir."  
Natasha wandered off in search of Pepper, not really interested in decorating the Christmas tree or socializing with the others anymore. She wished Jane had been in the tower with them as well, but she and Thor had left earlier in the week to go vacationing somewhere.

The white walls glowed eerily from the exit signs as the assassin took the flight of stairs down three floors. _Where was Peppers office again? Take floor twenty's door_… She opened the door and came to a long stretch of unlit hall. _Definitely not it_. She turned to go back into the stairwell.  
"Natasha?"  
Romanoff spun around, peering into the far end of the darkened hallway. Her eyes darted left to right, trying to find a hint of light to help her see. "Clint?" She asked uncertainly.  
There was a slight pause. "Here…" He answered softly, sounding distant.  
_It isn't like Stark to turn the lights off_, She thought, _which means either he's playing a trick on me, or I'm not supposed to be on this floor_. Natasha stayed where she was. But if it was Clint, how did he know where she'd be going… and so quietly. He could be sneaky yes, but _that_ good? _It's definitly Stark with his stupid watch_. She rolled her eyes and walked towards the open door that the voice had come from.  
"What do you want Tony-"

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

Barton's head snapped up from the puzzle he had taken over from the Tony-Hulk. "Hey!" He shouted.  
The Avengers (and Maxine) looked over to him.  
"What-?"  
"Shhh!" he shushed Steve. He cocked his head and listened harder.  
"What is it?" Tony whispered.  
Barton walked over to the door and opened it, looking up and down the hallway. "Thought I heard something…" he muttered.

"Hey Stark?" Maxine blurted.  
"Hey what?"  
"That's a nice watch."  
"Thanks. I was thinking of calling it a holo-pocket."  
Maxine grinned at him stupidly and nibbled on the end of her popcorn string.  
"What?" Tony asked. "What do you want?"  
She scooted closer to him on the couch and cleared her throat.  
"Whaaaat? What is it? Oh…" Tony flipped the device over in his hands and clasped it onto her wrist.  
"Eeeeee! Thank you!"  
Tony pointed to the screen. "Pick that one, it'll be funny."  
Maxine did as she was told, and suddenly the small couch creaked under Thor's weight.

"How…" Bruce took his glasses off to get a better look at the new model. "How much time did you spend designing Thor's armor?"  
"I did it last night."  
"I thought we agreed to make all the models wear simple clothing."  
"Yeah but Thor's armor is just so _cool_."  
Thor tugged at the end of his cape and turned the material over in his hands. "Guys… this is really awesome. It feels real… Like, soft and stuff." Maxine looked over to the Avengers. "What?"  
"It's weird," Barton said from the door, "hearing Thor say normal people things."  
"Yeah I did his voice last night too." Tony frowned at the god of thunder's wrist. "It sounds weird though. Static-y if you listen close enough."  
"Well, we've come really far-" Banner was interrupted midsentence by a sudden rumble coming from below them.

The Avengers froze until the noise stopped and the floor ceased to vibrate.  
"Stark…?" Banner asked.  
"Alright, if that explosion was mine," Tony defended himself, "you wouldn't have even heard it. I put my lab in a metric shit load of concrete and metal, you would not be able to notice explosions. And a metric shit load is a standard unit of measurement too, so…"  
"Where's Natasha?" Barton asked.  
"There," Tony answered, "there's your answer. It was Natasha; she probably exploded the microwave or something."  
Barton left the room in search of his rogue agent.  
"Hang on, I'm coming." Steve shouted and dropped the tinsel.  
Tony sighed. "Come on Brucie." He got up and exited the lounge along with Banner, insisting that it wasn't his lab that made the noise.

"So…" Thor grinned lopsidedly at the director. "Interesting night, huh?"  
Fury snorted and shook his head in disbelief.  
"Yeah... pity the hologram doesn't come with a mini-Mjolnir."  
"Gardner, instead of dinking around with holograms why don't you do your paperwork?" Fury asked.  
"I already did it." Thor replied, pulling a couple of papers out from the invisible purse around his waist. "Wanna see them?"  
Fury looked at the offered papers and shook his head. "Nah."  
"Hmph." Thor put the papers back. "What's so funny?" he asked, noticing the director snickering.  
"Nothing." Fury responded. "I know you have a purse on you, but it doesn't show up on Thor's body. It looks like your stuffing paper into his pants."

Thor snorted and another rumble sounded from below, making the director and the almost-god slightly nervous. They traded confused glances, and they both looked out the window into the night sky as if the stars held some secret answer.  
"This isn't normal…" Thor murmured at the glass. Maxine saw Fury's reflection in the glass ease himself up out of the seat and walk towards the door.  
"I'm going to go check on them." He announced. "You stay-" he was cut off by a loud scratching coming from the other side of the wall. It scraped twice, loudly, then stopped.

They stared at space of wall near the door, masking their breaths and trying to stay silent.  
"This isn't funny anymore." Thor whispered.  
"Gardner… move."  
Thor shot up from the couch and moved to the other side of the room, away from the door and out of Fury's path. _Dammit I'm squad five_, Maxine cried internally, _I never learned any offensive fighting moves! Maybe it's just Tony playing a trick._ The butterflies in her stomach told her she was wrong though, and both she and Fury waited for the door to make another move.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"Where'd Cap go?" Tony asked.  
"Forget that," Clint complained. "Why the hell are all the lights off?"  
"The explosion must've knocked them out." Banner mused.  
"Don't you have a flashlight built into that suit?" Clint asked.  
"You know, of all the things I do have…" Tony trailed off, surprised that he hadn't built in a flashlight. "I do have these eye things though." He shut the visor to his helmet, and the masks blue eyes lit up.  
"That's helpful, but a lot creepier." Clint complained again, taking in the blue walls.  
"Jarvis, who turned the lights out?"

There was a disturbing garbled static noise that emanated from the ceiling above them that trailed off softly after about ten seconds.  
"…Jarvis?" Tony asked.  
"Dude your butler is fucking creepy."  
"That doesn't usually happen…" Tony murmured. "Jarvis?"  
The snarling white noise picked up again, softer this time, and faded off after only a few seconds.  
"Barton I'm gonna kill your girlfriend if she's hurt Jarvis."  
Clint snorted and glanced around uneasily. "Yeah well, we gotta find her first."  
"We could try splitting up..." Banner offered his two cents.  
"Are you crazy?" Clint asked. "That's when everyone dies in horror movies."

"It's a good idea though." Stark said and turned to the two trailing behind him. "I'll go down to the lab to see if something did happen down there; which I know nothing did. It'll go faster because, you know…" he tapped his chest indicating his suit. "You guys go check the kitchen. That's, what, three floors down? I'll be back by then."  
Barton groaned in agreement and he and Bruce left for the nearest stairwell.

"Great." Tony walked in the opposite direction to the elevator doors and pried them open, looking down the drop to see if the elevator carriage was above or below him. He saw it sitting silently six floors up, and walked out into the open air, dropping down the shaft to the lowest floor. He grabbed the doors again and heaved them apart, taking in the serious lack of light in the basement._ I have a_ backup_ backup generator for this level_, he thought to himself.  
"Jarvis?" He called again.  
"Tony…"  
Stark took a few steps forward. "Pepper?" _That sounds like Pepper_. He waited for a response, but received none. "Pepper was that you with the…" he lifted the visor on his helmet again, "with the bangs? Is that you…?" He asked.  
He walked down the hall to the lab and peered inside, seeing nothing. _Wait…_ He looked closer where the sink was, and in the light of the reactor on his chest he could just make out a figure with glowing cat eyes. _That is _not_ Pepper_. He raised his hand to blast the creature through the glass, he'd ask questions later.

"Tony!"  
Stark whirled around to face the owner of the voice, "NOT PEPPER!" He screamed at the thing behind him. He realized too late that he'd been looking at the things reflection in the glass, not the actual creature. Raising his hand again, he aimed for its heart and fired.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

There was a one last rumble that could be heard from below before the tower finally settled into relative silence again.  
"Think that was Stark?" Clint asked.  
Bruce stared off into the dark. "I hope not."  
"It's useless looking for anyone without any lights, we should go turn on a generator… or something."  
"I'd imagine that's what Tony was doing…" Banner murmured. "The other generators are near his lab…"  
The two stood there in the gloomy kitchen, contemplating what to do next.  
"Let's double back and fetch Fury," Clint said, moving towards the door, "and Cap… wherever he's run off to."  
"Hm." Bruce didn't like that people were just disappearing. It didn't sit well with him… and when things didn't sit well…

"Where's the lounge again?"  
"Wherever the sound of gunfire is coming from," Banner snarled and ran for the stairs.  
"Oh for fucks sake…" Clint swore, chasing after a nervous Banner.

~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~

"Is it gone?" Thor asked from the Christmas tree.  
Fury stood his ground, waiting for something to happen. And all at once it did.

He pulled his gun out and pounded every bullet he had through the door and into whatever was on the other side. It was large and gold and looked suspiciously like Iron Man, _and it doesn't give two shits that it's being shot at_. He ran out of bullets and had a second magazine in hand ready to shove into his gun. In the two seconds Fury took to reload, the creature was there in one, and gone the next. Maxine watched in horror as the thing seemed to almost teleport in front of Fury and send the director flying backwards just by being in the same _space_ as him. _Sweet Jesus God Almighty_. She froze there, trying to blend in with the large green sparkly tree. The creature had disappeared from sight, but Maxine had no intention of moving from her hiding place.

"Director?" She asked. He was lying where he had collided with the wall, not six feet from where she stood. "Fury?" She heard Thor's voice warble a bit and tried not to cry. Maxine attempted to think of something that would get a reaction from her overseer. "Nicholas Joseph Fury," Thor whisper-shouted, "I sold out the Avengers and Hulk just killed a bajillion people."  
Nothing.  
Thor looked around the room and sank slowly to his knees and crawled over to where the director lay. "Fury?" He shook the director's arm gently. "Fury!"

"Thor Odinson."  
_Shit._  
Thor looked up to the large golden-clad man in front of him.  
_How did I not see him?_  
"Rise."  
Maxine stared at the man, mouth slightly agape and did as she was told - too frightened to even think to herself. At Thor's full height however, she noticed she stood a head taller than the man before her.  
"Do you know who I am?" He rasped, taking two steps back and assuming a fighting stance.  
"N-no?" Thor answered hesitantly.  
The creature remained silent, and looked Thor over warily. "You have no weapon… you were at a disadvantage before, now you have no hope at all."  
"Mmm…" Thor moaned, terrified.  
The creature cocked his head at the utterance. "Are you… frightened?" He asked, sounding a little disgusted.  
"No…"

"Fury!" Banner shouted from the doorway.  
_Oh thank God_, Maxine cheered internally.  
"FuurRRIE…!"  
_Oh dear God_, she whimpered.  
The gold man turned and saw Bruce convulsing in the doorway. He seemed to understand that he stood no chance against whatever was about to take over Banner, so he took his leave. He stepped forward once, and ended up right next to Maxine in a single bound, "You're coming with me, Odinson." He hissed, and grabbed Thor by the collar.

Maxine kept her eyes open long enough to see the room suddenly swirl together, like paint being flushed. Her body felt like it was being twisted and stretched, albeit painlessly, and she swore she could see the inside of her skull at one point. It took forever. Or it could have been only a second. But she felt solid again after a while, though she couldn't feel anything in particular.  
"The god of thunder…" She heard the man snarl angrily, "can no longer even stand after the jump. These humans have made you soft…"  
_  
Did we land?_ She couldn't feel her feet, and everything was dark. _Where are my eyelids?! _She felt something hard and heavy collide with the middle of her body, and remembered where her stomach was. _Did he just kick me?_  
"Your deaths will be glorious."  
_Perfect._

* * *

**Thanks for reading! :)**


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